So there are about 5 days out of the month, where I just wish that I could just go hide in the mountains ... alone. Because I know that nothing good will ever come out of these 5 days. And usually I'm right (because I create it to be that way), and I'm right because I have just proven that no one wants to be with me. And even though in my non-emotional brain, this is so far from the truth and even laughable, it still lives like it is very true to me in my emotional PMS brain. grrrr ...
Right now, I am in the emotional PMS brain, where I really wish that I could have gone up into the mountains and hid out until my non-emotional brain comes back out from hiding but I chose not to do that and instead decided that I really just wanted to pick a nasty fight with my husband. (sorry babe, I really am sorry) I hate these fights, I end up feeling smaller than an ant because I've just dug myself into a huge hole and so ashamed. And I have to go back to him and tell him that I'm a PMSing trying to think from a very emotional cloudy brain woman, which wasn't working at all.
The thing is, I keep wondering if this is just me that happens to. If I am the only crazy woman for 5-7 days out of the month. If it is just my husband that has to listen to the rants 5-7 days out of the month. Or if there has been anyone else who has ever experienced this and how in the heck do you deal with it? How do you keep your husband from feeling like he wants to totally get rid of you during those 5-7 days out of the month? I am totally frustrated and ashamed now.
